Project Polyglot Parry IV: Reborn! / New Year’s Resolutions 2016 @irishpolyglot #newyearsresolution @resolutions

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New Year’s Resolution 2016: An Update

Project Polyglot Parry: my personal quest to turn myself into a multilingual maestro. But I haven’t really applied myself to the task well of late. So one of my major new year’s resolutions for 2016 is to get back on track with my language learning. Part one of which is to start regularly doing Duolingo in Spanish and Swedish again. Well, I have now started.

One of the best ways of sticking to personal goals is to tell everyone. This way, social stigma forces you to see it through. Consider yourselves told.

© 2016 Bryan A. J. Parry

 

 

Virgin Media @virginmedia #virginmedia @talktalk_uk

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Before I moved into my new house, I specifically checked that I could get Virgin Media. The green tick helped persuade me to sign the tenancy agreement.

So I bop along down to my local Virgin Media store. They informed me that even though there’s Virgin cabling on my road, and even though both of my next door neighbours and half of my street have Virgin Media, and even though my house had Virgin Media under the previous tenant, I would not be able to get Virgin Internet!

Their reason?

Apparently it would be too much hard work for them to install it because they are doing re-cabling works.

See my letter above for the full details. But I find this amazing. Half the country can’t get Virgin anyway. And then here’s me, literally begging to become a customer, and they turn me away. Even though they can and do provide Virgin Media services to my road!

© 2016 Bryan A. J. Parry

Coming Soon: The Stationery Supplies Movie (2019)

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Sony Pictures Animation have announced that they have begun work on their latest motion picture themed around the exciting world of stationery supplies. Details of the plot at this stage are sketchy, but early drafts of the script involve a civil war within the International Standard “A” paper sizes based around two factions led by A3 and A4. The “B” and “C” sizes are too cowardly to piece the “A” family back together, so old retired hero Foolscap is tempted out of retirement for one last action packed adventure.

Just when you thought the studios had taken as much piss as possible with efforts like Pixels, now there is THE STATIONERY SUPPLIES MOVIE: COMING TO THEATERS CINEMAS IN 2019.

© 2015 Bryan A. J. Parry

featured image from https://uk.movies.yahoo.com/post/135840211056/emoji-movie-set-for-2017-release

Fashion Hijabs?

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This has always confused me. Muslim women are apparently supposed to cover their hair to show humility and, as some Imams I know tell me, to not excite the sexual passions of men (for hair is the sexiest part of the female, apparently). Yet, women who wear the hijab often have the most elaborate make-up — and the most beautiful, luxurious hijabs! Indeed, the more covered up, the more tarted up; I commonly see women in Niqab with the most outrageous eye make-up.

Now I love a beautiful hijab as much as the next guy. Seriously: the hijabs above are a joy to behold. But surely it defeats the object of the humility exercise. Let’s cover our plume up with an even more beautiful plume cover(!)

Anyway, Dolce & Gabbana have got on board with their luxurious hijabs. So all Muslims (just the women, though; men don’t have to cover their hair for some reason) can now be extra pretty whilst being extra holy and modest.

Fashion Hijabs

© 2016 Bryan A. J. Parry

featured image from https://uk.style.yahoo.com/post/136736611229/dolce-gabbana-launches-first-line-of-hijabs-and

Project Polyglot Parry III: January 2016 Update @irishpolyglot

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Project Polyglot Parry is me turning myself into a multilingual maestro. Unfortunately, despite being pretty regular on Duolingo, the graphic below(PROJECT Polyglot Parry March 2014) is still an accurate reflection of my language levels. How can that be possible? I’m where I was 22 months ago! Ah yes; a combo of not enough practice and not pushing myself enough when I do practice. Well, learning languages is on my 2016 New Year’s Resolutions, so I’ve got to get a grip. Enrolling on a class might be the way to force myself forward.

I don’t want to make excuses or put things off, but I am actually in the middle of several really important life things right now. I physically don’t have that much time. But I’m going to force myself to Duolingo again, effective immediate; I can do it on the bog (half an hour per language per day). Then I reckon in a couple of weeks or so, I can think about enrolling on classes and so on.

My ultimate goals for 2016 are to get myself the certificates and/or level of:

  • B1 TISUS level in Swedish,
  • B1 DELE in Spanish,
  • refresh my ancient Greek by successfully re-finishing Duff and then starting on Taylor’s GCSE to Greek I again,
  • Doing Portuguese Duolingo half an hour / two “disks” per day for the whole year.

As much as I’m keen on Basque — I’ve always loved the language, my wife is Basque, we have a house in the Basque Country –, I decided to only focus on learning that when I am certified C1 in Spanish.

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Polyglot Parry I
Polyglot Parry II

© 2015 – 2016 Bryan A. J. Parry

 

Fear the Beard! #FearTheBeard @guardian @Independent @libertyhq @realDonaldTrump

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I’m getting really angry now. Half the people I know didn’t go to one of London’s festive highlights this year: Winter Wonderland in Hyde Park. Why? ISIS… No joke. I have friends who’ve lost a lot of money from cancelled clients due to… the terror threat.

Sorry, but what the f*ck!? Is everyone a coward? Has everyone lost their minds? There’s very little chance of getting bombed or attacked. Yes, it is a possibility, and that is why the security services and police work hard to keep the public safe. But we can’t lose our heads and become fearful. We’re more likely to get glassed by a random twat down the local. That is a fact.

So why is terrorism so scary now? We’ve always been a target for terrorism in London going back hundreds of years. Guy Fawkes, anyone? The IRA?

Disturbingly, there is a racist undertone to this current panic, a racism which is helping fuel the fear. Hundreds of years being bombed, but now ‘cos these guys are brown, got beards, and speak a guttural language (y’know, like the Black Speech of Mordor Orcs in LOTR!), all of a sudden we need to lose our heads.

And the media don’t help. The portrayed otherness of Muslims, combined with a pod people-esque enemy next door slant to the story, is helping to fan the flames in a bid to have juicier sexed up news. It is disgraceful. But as the Roman philosopher-emperor Marcus Aurelius said, ‘We are in control of our reactions, and our reactions makes something good or bad’. If we let the terrorists, and the media, make us fearful and consequently change our routines — for example, by not going to Winter Wonderland type events –, then we are not being prudent and sensible. Rather, we are letting fear and cowardliness win. We are letting the terrorists win.

Democracy and our free way of life are based on a fearless, quiet, going about of our own business in confidence. We have nothing to fear but fear itself — for fear has always been the enemy of democracy and freedom. Nero and the fire in Rome, to the burning of the Reichstag in 1933, to 9/11 and the Patriot Act, fear has always led to an erosion of our freedoms and our free way of life. Back in 1859, John Stewart Mill warned us in On Liberty that totalitarianism doesn’t just come from the state and state agencies — society can itself be the tyrannical agent.

Don’t let the terrorists win. Don’t fear the beard. Go about your normal business; our democracy is at stake. Save democracy; go the Winter Wonderland. And use my ironic hashtag: #FearTheBeard.

© 2015 – 2016 Bryan A. J. Parry

featured image from http://img.wonkette.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/osama-bin-zombie.jpg

 

New Year’s Resolutions 2016 #newyearsresolution @resolutions

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Being creatively fulfilled, healthy, learning languages, and sorting my career out is what I want most (along with maintaining and/or strengthening healthy relationships with the people I care about). 2015 Began with plenty of hope, but kind of fizzled out. And so unlike this time last year, I feel rather down about my chances of achieving my Resolutions for 2016. But I’ve got to give it a go. So without further ado, I present BRYAN PARRY’S 2016 NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS.

GOALS FOR 2016

  1. Do something, at least half an hour, from each [CATEGORY] on this list, every day.
  2. [LANG] 30′ minimum every day each for Swedish and Spanish using Memrise and Duolingo.
  3. [LANG] Work towards B1 level in Spanish and aim to sign up for a course in the last quarter of 2016.
  4. [LANG] Do an A2 Swedex.
  5. [LANG] Complete Duff’s The Elements of New Testament Greek, and then Taylor GCSE 1, again. One chapter a fortnight. Upon completion, look into doing GCSEs in Ancient Greek again.
  6. [ART] Continue updating The Doggerelizer weekly, Wrixlings monthly, start updating YouTube twice monthly.
  7. [ART] Do one cartoon per six weeks; begin to upload them and/or other artwork online.
  8. [ART] Get the first draft of Part II of a book I’m writing, code name 21CLF, finished in a “polished draft”.
  9. [ART] Get the first draft of Part III of “21CLF” finished.
  10. [ART] Get one feature length script up to 2nd/3rd draft stage.
  11. [ART] Send off the pilot of one of my sitcom series ideas to a producer.
  12. [ART] Over the course of a year, do an average of one 30′ sitcom script per six weeks — total redrafts of scripts are counted towards this goal.
  13. [LIFE] My weight has ballooned again: cut myself down to a healthy BMI & weight (around 13st; a pound loss a week for 52 weeks) and stay there through healthy changes of diet and exercise regime, specifically, a minimum of three days going to the gym, daily use of the work gym for 30′ intense sessions, and less snacks.
  14. [LIFE] Pass my driving theory test and begin lessons.
  15. [LIFE] Get out and stay out of my overdraft.
  16. [WORK] Sit and pass the International Phonetics Association exam.
  17. [WORK] Research and apply to do an MA/MPhil in an area of Linguistics.
  18. [WORK] Begin a DELTA to improve my ESOL career.
  19. [WORK] Do the first two editing courses, set up as an official business, network and set up online media relating to the business.
  20. [WORK] Get a better paid job.
  21. [GEN] Go to Thailand with the Missus. [during Thai dry season]
  22. [GEN] Finish reading the Koran.

© 2015 Bryan A. J. Parry